Right now, I am blessed with at LEAST 4 melt downs before lunch. And these melt downs include ALL the works... SCREAMING, CRYING, HITTING, THROWING HIMSELF ON THE GROUND, SCREAMING, DOING A BACK BEND WHEN I TRY TO HOLD HIM, SCREAMING, did I remember to say screaming? UGH! I am honestly TRYING to be patient. TRYING to find teachable moments, but DANG, it is NOOOOOOOOOOT EASY!
The gym is currently my hour or so saving grace. I can go and run my brains out (or whatever) and he plays, nicely (no tantrums there) during the same time. Yeah, did you catch that? NO TANTRUMS for the nice ladies at the gym. Don't get me wrong, I would be HUMILIATED if he did. But, knowing that he saves all of his extra special fit throwing for M-E.... well, it doesn't make me feel all warm and fuzzy inside :-(
Just today I'm trying to use time out. The thing is, he doesn't really get it. I sat him down (while he was SCREAMING so it isn't like he could hear me anyhow), and kept myself very calm (NOT easy). I explained that he couldn't get up until he calmed down. he would scream and reach for me to hold him. I would hug him and then set him back down. Which of course led to more screaming. We did a cycle of that for probably close to 5 mins. (with screaming in the background the ENTIRE time). Eventually, he calmed down. I asked him to tell his sister he was sorry and he did and hugged her. All was good... for about 5 minutes... It's just ridiculous and honestly, I just don't have the time or patience to sit there with him while he learns that it is socially unacceptable to throw a fit when things don't go your way.
I guess I will be getting started on the book that I got a while ago, Setting Limits with Your Strong Willed Child... now's as good a time as any, right? Is there something spectacular that you've done? Please feel free to post any and ALL advice that you have!
My advice is coming from being certified in Special Education from birth through high school. My own son is only 8 months old, so I haven't had to use any real discipline on him, yet! Consistency is key. Also, time out is time out (and is important for both of you). There should be zero interaction during time out. It should last about one minute per year of age (so only 1-2 minutes for him right now). He acts out during this time because he wants your attention. If you give him your attention while he is acting out, you are just going to reinforce the acting out. Now, when my son is being obnoxious in another several months, ask me if I followed my own advice. :)
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